Sunday, 29 July 2012

Sunday Mini Goals

Gosh, I love this city.
1. Blogging  - Still a fail.  I’m trying to get used to this public blog thing and making it a part of my life.  Hard to believe considering I had a semi-private blog for close to 10 years.

2. Food - I'll give myself an 90% on this one.  I was great during the week but probably had too much booze this weekend again (traveling Via – Business Class?  How could I not?).

When did I start liking white wine?
3. Work-Outs – Once again, there were 2 days I didn’t get to the gym, but I still MOVED.  Most of Saturday and Sunday were spent walking, and Thursday was all about cleaning.  And I even visited the hotel gym.  I'm so excited to see how accessible hotels are now making it to workout.

4. Kelly – Really starting to feel like myself again.  Gosh I love make-up.

Sephora haul <3
5. Meal Prep – AWESOME.  I nailed this one this week and hoping to do the same in the upcoming week.

This week’s new goal:

Add running back to the schedule.  I don’t know what it is but my love for running waxes and wanes at times.  I need to be a runner again.

Friday, 27 July 2012

Friday Morning Weigh-In #4

Can I just say: Finally!

This week has been a 90%.  I’m excited to see what happens on a 99% week, but let’s remember that I’m young, and though I view food as fuel, I’m a foodie at heart who loves booze.  No week will be 100% for me.  I’m admitting it and I’m okay with it!

I meal prepped like a fiend this week.  I had my quinoa and chicken cooked.  My veggies were cut.  My fruit was cleaned and put away.  Boy did that help!   This has GOT to be a regular thing from now on.
Bento Boxes FTW!

I also made Jamie Eason’s Turkey Meatloaf Muffins and they were such an easy grab and go item that I’ll for sure be continuing with this!

I also tried my best to have protein at every meal.  Nut butters, nuts, eggs, turkey muffins, and hummus were staple snacks.   They helped me feel full and were more delicious then snacking on just carrots.
Who said eating healthy/losing weight meant that you have to starve yourself?   This is only 1/2 my day!
 The thing is, I have to fight tooth and nail with my weight.  If my body acted ‘normally’, I’d probably be a normal weight.  But it likes to be stubborn, and I have to accept that.  That said, this week was a big deal for me.  I actually lost a whole pound!  And proceeded to do a happy dance. 

I have to remember that every little bit down is a victory.  It’s my victory.
8 weeks ago vs. Now.  This was an eye opener.
This is where I’m putting it out there.  I am a jealous person.  It’s something I fight against a lot of times and it takes away from enjoying things.  The problem with the blogosphere?  It makes that green monster come out sometimes.  That girl lost 4lbs in a week?  Why can’t I do that? This is so unfair.  Blah blah blah.  I have to be comfortable in my own victories.  Large or small, because this is my fight and only mine.  

Bus, Subway, Train!
 As an fyi, I so won't be 100% this weekend.  I'm currently on a business class train, with free booze, on my way to one of my favourite cities.  Montreal!  I'm going to eat at a cafe, have wine and a beer, and be okay with it.  I'm also going to swim, walk, and gym my heart out when I'm there.

Monday, 23 July 2012

Sunday Mini Goals

It's Monday, I know.  I was so busy working on one of my goals this week that I didn't manage to get my blog out on time.  Tsk tsk.  Promise I'll get better some day.

So let's look at how I did last week.

1. Blogging  - Total FAIL.  I meant to blog more than I did and I definitely don't have a plan minus Sunday Mini Goals and Friday Weigh-Ins.

2. Food - I'll give myself an 80% on this one.  I tanked one night and had nachos, but I only ate about 1/2 (I can usually inhale nachos).  The other issue was that I didn't stick to booze ban and had about 2 too many beers on Friday night.  I will give myself credit for not ordering more food later in the night.

3. Work-Outs - I actually did manage to move every day.  I thought I had taken Friday/Saturday off but I walked to dinner on Friday and I played with a 4 year old on Saturday.

4. Kelly - Make-up every day and I felt pretty!


This week, all those 4 remain plus 1 more.

I spent all day Sunday grocery shopping and food prepping.  I cut everything.  Precooked chicken and quinoa, and thought about what I was going to have when.   I also made Jamie Eason's Turkey Meatloaf Muffins this morning.  I am so set!

The organizational fairy visited my fridge!  Greg, this is what happens when you're not here!

Friday, 20 July 2012

The Epic Battle - Friday Morning Weigh In #3

Now, I haven't done a randomized control trial on this subject, but I'm willing to bet that most trying to be fit, healthy, whatever, has had the Epic Scale Battle.  

It's the kind of battle that ends up being more head vs. heart then just willing the numbers to move.

I know, I know, I know, I know, that your body can change and the scale may barely move.  So the rational part of me sits on my right shoulder, telling me I've started weight training, that I'm eating better, that people have documented time and time again that you can look better at 135 than 120 if you have more muscle mass and a lower fat %. 

But on my left shoulder is the the little voice that says: but you once saw 121 on the scale.  You've been there before.  It should be easy to get there again.   Why don't you go to the gym 2x/day?  Stop eating so damn much.  I don't care if it's healthy.  Blah blah blah blah. 

I'm fighting that voice so badly this time.  Shoving it down and beating her up.  Because I can't let the scale ruin my day. 

That's why this time around, I've got progress pictures to refer back to as well.  It helps keep my head in the game.

So why the ramble before the weight reveal?  Because this week I lost .2lbs.  POINT TWO.  But it's still a loss. 

And I have this terrible instagram picture to show you folks.  I don't actually know what I started off as on this scale, but I think I was around 178-180.  Today, I'm 174.6lbs.  Slow and steady.  Just like Franklin the turtle. ;)

Wednesday, 18 July 2012

The Kelly Goal

As a physio, I'm pretty much able to head to work in a decent looking t-shirt and lululemon pants.  And I do.  Part of this is because I find it easier to work in yoga pants, and part is because I feel like it's easier to hide my flaws in these outfits.  If I wear anything else I'm constantly tugging at everything to make it look better and make sure I don't show any skin.

The Kelly goal this week was created over the weekend because I realized something:  I feel so much better about myself when I feel pretty.  I don't need to get all over the top with my outfits, but at least blow drying my hair and putting on a bit of make up seems to improve my mood immensely.  And it makes me realize that I AM pretty, along with nice, funny, crazy, and just plain weird.

It's Wednesday, and I almost gave up on the goal today after waking late and feeling cranky that I didn't make my spin class but I twisted my hair back and threw on some mascara and it helped!

Random photos from this weekend that reminded me I can get dressed up:

Basically, getting my hair done is an excuse to take pictures of myself.   Also, please note my amazing boyfriend in the background of this one.

Feeling like myself.  Love my hairdresser - she gets it bang on no matter how vague I am.  AND loving finally feeling like I can be 'me'.  It took me 26 years, but I finally said screw it, got the piercings I wanted, and did crazy things like shaved part of my head and stretched my ears.  (Believe me I look a lot more hardcore in this picture than I actually am!

Ignore my dorky face, I'm really bad at outfit pictures. 

I've become a dress lover. 


Because I can choose to highlight my favourite parts of me: my waistline and the girls.

And it's been a bajillion degrees outside and I can't stand wearing shorts.  I never had and never will have small legs, so every pair of shorts I try on will fit in the waist but squeeze my thighs.  It's a really horrible feeling and it just makes me feel worse about myself.  Dresses are so much easier to deal with.

I figure the only way to truly embrace this journey is to get comfortable with me now and the rest will fall into place.

Sunday, 15 July 2012

Sunday Mini Goals and a Recipe

With the start of a new week, comes new goals to attack!  

1.  Blogging -  This week I want to formulate a plan for this little blog of mine.  I need to get a solid handle on what I want to blog about on certain days so it's not so damn random all the time.  I also really need to work on a graphic header to make my blog prettier and some extra pictures for things!

2.  Food - My goal for the week here is quality.  I have a habit on days I have calories left over on MFP to reach for chocolate, froyo, or some other not great for me but certainly tastes yummy treat.  Friday was certainly one of those days.  Yogurty's was screaming my name, but so was Oh She Glow's peanut butter smoothie.  I choose the smoothie.   It may have even had a few extra calories compared to the froyo/sorbet, but it was much better for my insides.  

I'm working on quality foods rather than how many calories I eat.

3.  Work-Outs - I need to work on moving every day still.  I really like the 5-4-3-2-1 workout, so I may try to do 1 round of something similar each day.  On top of that, I'm doing weights right now as well because I love them.... so I'll eventually get around to talking about that here.

4.  Kelly - I need to make some time for the things I love.  This week, I want to try to do my makeup before work each day!  It seems so easy (hello What Not to Wear's 5 minute face) but it's so often the thing I forget to do.
 Citrus Shrimp Salad
It took me about 24 years to like salad, and another 2 years or so to actually like fruit in my salad.  This salad has the perfect amount of salty, sweet, and peppery flavours to convert me.


1 container of arugula
10-15 shrimps
10-12 fresh green olives
1 orange, segmented
1/4-1/2 red onion

*note, I didn't measure while I made this, I tend to go by taste, so taste as you go
Juice of 1 orange
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
1 tbsp dijon mustard
1 tbsp honey
1 tbsp olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Whisk marinade ingredients together, coat shrimp reserving approximately 1/4 cup for the dressing and marinade for 1-2 hours. 

I sauteed my shrimp, but they would have been better grilled.  

Combine salad ingredients, toss with dressing, and serve!  

Easy Peasy!

Friday, 13 July 2012

Friday Morning Weigh-In #2

Excuse the face.  I'm at work and exhausted!
So did I do it?  Did this crazy body that REFUSES to shed weight actually maybe lose something?

The answer:

My feet look really awkward.  Wide, flat feet for the win!

Kind of.  I lost .4lbs and honestly, I'll take it.  A loss is a loss and I had some not so great moments last weekend and a total sushi pig out during the week which I'm sure left some sodium bloat running rampant in my body.  Here's hoping for another loss next week!

Thursday, 12 July 2012

No Excuses

Tomorrow is my first 'official' weigh-in day.  Ahh.  Okay, so I didn't really follow my own goal this week and peeked a couple days ago, but it could really go any way!  We'll see tomorrow!

I am the queen of excuses.  It's pretty bad.  The biggest one is 'I'm tired' or 'I'm training'.  I plan on starting to full out Du train again August 6, but before then I really want to make sure I'm losing weight to be a little lighter for my Du.  

I have odd work hours.  Officially, I'm supposed to work 12-7 or 8, 4 days a week, with Friday being 10-6.  Unfortunately, Tu/Th often end up with me at work a lot earlier.  And refusing to get out of bed in order to exercise.  I go through my day dragging my feet and kicking myself at 10pm when I'm sitting on my couch beating myself up for not being active.

To tell the truth, I'm usually hanging on my couch from 8-11 not doing a single productive thing.  It's time to start changing that.

Today (Thursday), I ended up having a 9:30-7pm work schedule.  Le sigh.  I set two, TWO alarms.  One at 6:30, and one at 6:50.  After a fitful night's sleep, I just couldn't get out of bed in time.  The thing is, THERE ARE NO EXCUSES.  I did get up at 7:20 and could have fit a quick body weight/cardio in but I didn't. 

Luckily, I had a nice 2 hour gap in my schedule and not a TON of paperwork to do.  So I sucked it up and did 2 rounds of this crazy workout:

Yes, I'm all over pinterest!

I was hot, sweaty, and tired by the time I was done, but it was such a good afternoon pick-me-up and it gave me so much more energy!

I'm actually hoping to head over to the gym on my way home tonight and get some weights in.  We'll see what the night brings.  But it's high time I stopped being so damn lazy!

Wednesday, 11 July 2012

Everything in Moderation

When I stated that I needed to work on smaller goals this time around, one of them was to stop over doing it when I ate out. 

One of the biggest places I needed to work on this goal is when Greg and I hit up Sushi Tuesday! 

For the last 6 weeks (?!) Greg and I have been making Sushi Tuesdays a regular habit.  No fail, by about 3pm Tuesday, all I can think about is sushi.

It's gotten so ridiculous that this happened:

G and I now have our own chopsticks at our local sushi place.  I know.  This is probably not a good thing.

That said, sushi CAN be a healthy alternative when out.  As long as you stay away from all the tempura, mayo, and Sapporo. 

So one of my goals in my head is to not completely pig out when we get there.  Gone is sushi pizza (oh good lord the yumminess), and we've dropped down to 3 rolls total, with one being a veggie (usually avocado cucumber).  We've also tried to add more sushi, rather than maki rolls. 

Over the past couple weeks I've felt so much better leaving the restaurant, and it has really cut back on the sodium hangover I would get!

Last night, I was reminded not to go back to previous ways, as I left with a sushi baby from the bloat.  We went with friends and ordered 7 rolls, and sushi pizza.  It sounded reasonable, and about what we would eat normally now (just a touch more), but man did I not feel great after.

Note to self:  moderation doesn't mean eliminate, nor does it mean stuff your face like crazy once a week.

Excuse me while I go pound back some water!

Monday, 9 July 2012

Sunny with Cloudy Periods

Let's face it.  Not every moment in one's weight loss or fitness journey is sunshine and rainbows.  And if yours has been, then no sarcasm intended, good for you.

Mine, however, has been as much as a mental battle as it has been physical.

This time around I've been really really trying to be positive.  I'm trying not to sit in front of my mirror picking every little thing apart and failing to see the good.

Spending a good chunk of my time at my cottage this weekend, the clouds started to roll in and I was having trouble pushing them away.

The good:  Spending two hours out on the lake bass fishing with my dad and best friend soaking up the rays.   My grandfather was a fishing guide, and I dare say his genes live on with me.  There is nothing better than some sun, the quiet of a lake, and the promise of a good fishing spot.  I felt totally relaxed in that 12' aluminum boat.

The bad:  We went out on Saturday evening in the pontoon boat for a swim and to  visit family friends.  Unfortunately, that meant putting on a swim suit.  AND I forgot to grab a tank top and workout shorts.  Which wouldn't be the end of the world, except I only have bikinis right now.... and well... I'm just not feeling comfortable squeezing into them. 

My bikini purchase from last year (@ about 165lbs).  I had it on this weekend and felt so uncomfortable.  It felt like it was tight in the wrong places and not flattering at all.  It heightened the one thing that tends to give me the most anxiety of all about this journey:  those who have seen me at my smallest will judge me for getting 'big' again.  Even though I'm healthier and more active than I was the last time at this weight, I'm still AT THIS WEIGHT.

I spent the last 24 hours on a bit of a rollercoaster trying to shove the self-esteem issues away and let myself be comfortable as me so that I can concentrate on pushing myself harder in the gym and making me the best me possible.  If that means that I don't make it to 135lbs but I'm as healthy as I can be and I've reached my fitness goals, then so be it. 

And heck, maybe I can rock a bikini at 175lbs. 

Friday, 6 July 2012

Friday Morning Weigh-In #1

I've decided to make Friday mornings weigh-in days!

Scales can be a very evil thing for me and can really change my mood in an instant.  I'm vowing to not get on the scale a million times in a row (as in, at once, or multiple times a day, or several days in a row)!

I'll be getting on once a week, probably on the scale at work to keep it consistent and because it is digital so less than 1lb weigh-ins will be track-able.  I also really despise the scale we have at home (It's one of those digital ones that you may be up or down 3lbs in 30 seconds.  UGH).  So work scale it is.  It's also the scale that our trainer uses when personal training his clients, so it's got to be somewhat good right?

I was at least going to make this exciting by posting a picture of the scale but I totally forgot this morning and now the room is in use with some training!

Being accountable online has got to get this process kick started right?

The scary number today?



Okay folks!  Hoping to see 169 by the time I head to my friends cottage.  

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

July Mini Goals

Consistently see the scale under 170 by the end of July
  • This has probably been one of the most frustrating things for me in the last 6 months or so.  I've been bouncing in the 170s, getting to 171.5, but never making it under the 170 mark.  I think if I push myself hard enough I can get this done.  I'm desperate to see 160.
 Booze Ban
  • I love beer.  I also love wine.  I also can't seem to have one bottle or one glass.  This started with duathlon training, but since I don't have a ton of weekend or party plans for July, I'm going to try to keep this one up all month.  There may be one exception to this rule but I'll play it by ear.  I have to say, starting booze ban has made me feel a million times better.  No hangovers.  No poor eating secondary to being a little buzzed!
 Healthy Restaurant Choices
  • G and I like going out to eat 1-2 times a week.  Unfortunately, I can't seem to resist the french fries, wings, or yummy mayo filled wrap at these places.... or the sushi  pizza.... mmmmmm.  So, for July, I will not choose these options, and instead keep with the good-for-me body fuel even when out. 
Move Every Day
  • I have about 2 scheduled rest days per week but I have a tendency to be realllllly lazy on those days.  I'm hoping to make sure I'm moving at least a little on those days.  A walk somewhere, maybe a short bike ride, or if I'm feeling up to it some tabata drills.  
  • In looking back in pictures, and since starting a new weight program (I'll get to that later), I've realized how damn RIGHT dominant I am.  I can barely flex the left side of my body!  I had a real eye opener when I had to do preacher bicep dumbbell curls and had to use about 5lbs less on the left.  This will not only help my body balance and definition, but it also should help my job!

I have 27 more days to get these done!

Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Operation Fit For What?

Finally, I'm getting this post out! Soon to be linked as a page with updates!  Promise.

Okay, first of all, if you haven't noticed already, I ramble.  I elaborate.  I like to pretty much tell you every irrelevant detail of my life or story I'm telling that day.  I don't really plan on changing that.  The way I write is the way I think.  I used to have a semi-private blog and those who have now moved on to reading this can attest to this fact.  I am just forewarning you all that it may really come out in this post.

The second title of this blog is Operation Get Fit 2012 but what am I getting fit for?  Well, my friends that's a complicated explanation.

Back in the day when I lost 70lbs I was on my way to getting fit but really had no plan or a very good understanding of my goals except to 'lose weight'!  I began running and finally started to build running goals.  I ran my first 10k race during Ottawa Race Weekend and did it in 1:13.  My only goal was to not stop running and I did it!   I then started working out with my school buddies and lifting weights, again not really having a goal in mind.
My back, back in the day... one of the things this time around is to work on using my left arm... haha.
Everything was working okay until about 3 years ago when the train went off the tracks.  Suddenly I was gaining weight again and found myself slowly deconditioning.  Running wasn't fun any more.   It was work.  And after that first 10k I didn't look into how to train to be better... I faltered and had a lot of trouble finding my groove again.

The last year has been a bit of a mash.  I ran three 10k races last year,  completed Insanity, tried my hand at New Rules of Lifting for Women, ran another 10k, and just finished my first duathlon.

Starting in May, I have now decided that it's time for GOALS.  I can't keep flailing around and expect results.  The reason I want to lose weight this time around is for my health, but also because I plan on doing another duathlon, and the lighter I am the easier it will be!

Looking like a boss in my pink Saucony's

  1. Complete A Second Duathlon  -  I've already mentally committed to the Ottawa Fall Colours Duathlon, but I think I'm going to need to talk myself up to this.  I know I can complete it, the problem will be to not attach too much pressure to this one.   First, it's only number 2, second, it's only 3.5 months after the first one.  While I hope to see improvements, I can't expect to do blow my results out of the water.  
    • A mini goal is also to improve my running.  I'm hoping to be able to do a 30-35min 5k before race day.
  2. 130-145lbs by the End of the Year (though preferably my birthday)  -  Giving myself a weight goal is probably not the best idea, but I feel most comfortable with myself around the 135lb mark and would really like to get back down there!  At the very least I'd like to be able to squeeze back into my size 8s.  
  3. Gain Back My Strength - By the end of Physio school I finally had a solid weight routine going and was encouraged by my friends when I needed to up the weights.  I've been struggling to find my balance between cardio/race training and weights.  I love lifting heavy objects and throwing them around, but it tends to negate speed.  I'm still working on what feels right but I want to start seeing definition again.
  4. Learn to Love/Stop the Negative Self-Talk - Oh how many of us struggle with this more than anything when trying to lose weight, eat clean, and exercise.  It's sad really.  It's been a life long battle for me and I've been really working on it over the past 2 months.  I find if I eat well and keep the exercise up, then the negative talk decreases a lot!  So that may be my key. 

Monday, 2 July 2012

What I Learned From My First Duathlon

This post is partly for Amy, and mainly for me to remember come October.

Going into the Du, I really had no idea what to expect.  I had read a few blogs, but I knew that the only way to figure out what to do was to, well, do it.

Hydrate, hydrate and hydrate some more.

I thought I had hydrated enough the night before and the morning of, but I still found myself thirsty within the first few kilometres of the bike... and I couldn't get my bottle off my bike easily!  It deterred me from drinking through the course which was a big no no.   I also knew in the back of my mind that I hadn't drank as much water as I'd like since I was drinking out of plastic bottles (which I kind of hate the way water tastes in them...).  Note to self: figure out the best way to drink water on the bike course.  I'm hoping it won't be such a big deal next time since the next one is in October.  I also use Nuun tablets and I find them extremely useful for electrolyte balance.


As mentioned in my previous post, I didn't sleep very well the night before.  I assume this has something to do with the fact that I gassed out on the second run.  I will do everything I can to sleep 8ish hours next time.  I really don't think it was something I could have avoided that night, but next time I WILL sleep.


Everyone, I mean EVERYONE will tell you to practice transitions.  From what I've been told, people tell you this in order for you to be faster.  My advice is to know what a transition feels like.  Whatever, you fiddle with your helmet, take a couple extra swigs of your water, maybe you're in there for a full minute, that stuff doesn't matter to newbies (in my opinion).  What matters is understanding how your legs feel after the bike and knowing that you can push forward.  As soon as you swing your leg over from the bike, you feel like you're floating.  I barely felt like I had legs to stand on and I wasn't sure how in the world I was walking.  I wasn't unnerved by it though, as I had felt that way a few weeks prior when I did a 20R/60B/40R brickwork.

It's all mental

 I think this one's a given.  I spent a lot of my run and bike talking to myself.  More like talking myself off the edge.  Every hill was the last one I had to tackle in my head.  Every pylon was just a few more feet to run.   The thing you have to keep telling yourself is that you CAN do it.  It may not be pretty, it may not be fast, but you can cross the finish line!